Good year indeed...

Well second month in and I'm a bit off from where I wanted to be in terms of progress with things but oh well. Life's been going very well so far, but February is kind of off to a rough start. Either way, here's a quick update of things I've been working on.


The last time we hit up the mall for drawing I remembered that I hadn't done backgrounds in a while. (Maybe for a good reason) I started just drawing the malls food court, sans people. I didn't really do any perspective lines so I imagine I'm off all over the place in terms of vanishing point, either way it was nice to try tackling some high detail scenery. uhh minus all the real detail that the mall had.



Back to the old pieces I had been working on, Jarrett suggested that I try revamping my old Kaneda pic that I had done a while back. So heres the original.



I sort of like the other drawings I didn't really make a layer for structure, I thought the pose was ok so I just went ahead and started with a fresh layer over top and started hacking away at it. Like the previous pictures I had to go back and reference for more details on the characters clothing, gun and battery pack for laser gun, which wasn't a belt clip but a shoulder belt slung battery.



And heres the final product with everything I could think of putting in for detail. another piece ready to colour when I have the time, once I finish up my other semi big piece I'm working involving about 8 characters or so. Fun... Either way. Just gotta keep working at it, get back on the train, and hope that my life outside of art will return to normal towards the end of the month. Hopefully...

Oldies but Goodies

And so we begin once again! Another year passes and for once I didn't make a New Years post. Oh well, It'd probably be kinda emo anyway!

So to start off, I think I have a really good feeling about this year. I don't know how to describe it... but I just feel really good about this year. And I'm determined to learn a lot and build a lot as an artist. So with that begin said, I've started going over old work I've had and I'm bringing it back to life to fix it then colour it. Now, if you don't know me personally, that alone is pretty hard for me to accomplish since I get demotivated part way through so I end up never really finishing... anything.

But this year... NO MORE!

Anyway, I'll stop talking and introduce the first piece I've been working on.


OK so I posted this last year and it was something I had done from a little while back. It's Gwendolyn from Odin Sphere. And as you can see here... disaster.. Proportions are all over the place and I clearly ran out of room on my paper.


Enter the next phase and I brought the picture into sketchbook and started resizing and cutting, moving and reorienting things around. This helped me get alot of issues cleared up and I decided to go with more realistic proportions as oppose to my really shitty ones and the ones used by the original artist and the game sprites.


Lastly, the final line cleaned up version. Now getting here was... kinda rough. First things first, I had to crack out some freaking references for this character. Discovering details I didn't know existed from looking at some of the art references for the character. I had to look at images of the figures and resin kits that existed to find that I was missing a leather skirt under what I thought was a skirt to begin with. Then to find out how much detail is on the wings on the boot section, and then the boots... well if you look at the previous one was in terms of details then you'll see what I had to add. For my first real digital clean up, I was pretty happy. Or do I have a reason to be happy? -_-;


The Second picture I thought I'd do is Aigis from Persona 3. I liked the original of this piece but after going over it I discovered that it had some issues when referencing more official art from the game. Also another annoying thing about this character.. well and the previous one, is just... retarded amounts of detail. anyway, this one is just a reference for resizing and moving stuff around.


Second one is just a semi overlay of the final. I only ended up using one layer on this but I really should have used some more. Oh well. In this one it's basically how I realigned things that should have been a certain way before and also accenting certain details like giving her defined legs as oppose to... stumps...


Final product, one really annoying thing to finish but I'm happy with the results and that it's done. the details that I remember taking the longest where probably the hips, arm and gun segments with ammo caches, shoulders. Anything that suppose to be see through grate kinda things.

Next week I'll post other pieces I've been working on redoing, and some new stuff that I started working on last minute!

It's a great start to the year, and it feels good to draw again after taking a long hiatus from it. Just gonna keep on givin 'er!

So... the years pretty much over eh?

Well, it's been since freakin APRIL since I updated my blog. Lots of things have happened and it's been a busy summer. And here we are in December. I guess one way of looking at it is that this blog reflected exactly how this year went, fast.

Anyway, heres a quick update on things for the whole under 3 people that visit this site!

OK so here's a piece I did because well I like Earthbound and I've been playing Mother 3 (North America knows it to be Earthbound 2 in the series) anyway, awesome game. I thought it deserved fan art, so there!


So since I'm done work now, me and friends I worked with go to the mall to sketch on occasion. So here are a couple of people!


During the process of drawing at the mall, my mind tends to wander alittle so I end up drawing uhh... video game stuff... which it seems like my mind is stuck in alot these days...


More mall people, I like the guy eating with his back facing me, and the girl on her cell phone. Oh and the guy that has the siren on his head is the mall security that roll around on roller blades.

Ok so lastly mall people and uhh... Chun Li.. she was at burger king..

Anyway, I swear I'm back on the train and I'm hoping I'll be updating, infact I'm going to go back and clean up some old pictures and post the progress as I go so hopefully updates... soon... yes...

payce

New Stuff! (Part 2 of 2)

Ok so all this stuff in this post is stuff within the past 2 weeks or so, so now we're within the really recent stuff, along with the post I made on friday of last week. Anyway this one I was goofing aroudn with more kung-fuish poses and then MUPPET BATTORU. Did you ever have one of those raggity dolls you whipped around when you were a toddler? What if they had a KUNG FU FIGHT!? Maybe it'd look like this?

I really slowed down on drawing in general so now I'm finding I need to just do more posing to make sure I don't get things too stiff. Oh man, if my design teacher Tom saw this he'd be crying... heck, he probably is still crying "How is Chris working in animation?! He's still got so much too learn!!"
Once again more posting, oh man this girl on the left the torso is too huge and I don't even know what happened to her hips and mid section. The picture on the right I was trying to get the heavier hips going and push the pose from a different angle. Then I thought, what if I made it look like Chun Li from SF Alpha.. and then she was Chun Li from SF Alpha...
Heres more Early works with posing, gotta get my posing down and try and make them stronger. Also posing out some of the character from the show I'm working on. Except for the girl in the magician outfit. She's a shrunken version of Trucy Wright from Apollo Justice: Ace Attorney for Nintendo DS. (Awesome game, totally recommend it for good story and hilarious characters)
Posing posing and more posing. Just trying to get stronger posing again and shake the rust off. My personal favorite is the guy in the top left pulling a one cheek sneak.
OK so these guys here are from an idea I had with my boss Glen about making a character whose a washed up mexican wrestler who works at a 7 eleven. I really tried to do a more Ren and Stimpy style of face design and really push expressions more.
This is a quick panel of a short idea I came up with for my friend Ragnar's characters he came up with. They're all looking a a smashed bread bun instead of what you might think to be is.... doo doo... Either way I thought it was funny

Posing posing and more posing once again, really trying to get back into things. You can probably tell that some of the poses I have are repeated again. Just because I really want to push characters further, and thats what all my teachers used to say so that idea has always stuck with me.

Anyway thats the end of the big update! 4 posts in one night or... one morning.. gah it's 3am.. and I gotta be up at 7:45... well... I'm boned... but for everyone else looking, ENJOY!

leave a comment, suggestions whatever I'd love to hear from whoever comes to this blog! (probably not many... ahh.. my people....)

New Stuff! (Part 1 of 2)

OK so time for some current stuff! Here some quick posing I was doing for the show I'm workin on now, just goofing around with the characters abit. (The quick sketches on the middle to top right are done by Glen Kennedy, our studios animation director, stand up guy with loads of experience in the field (remember He-man? thats what I mean by experience) and is an awesome guy to work for) Wanna find out more about this show, check out the company website here!

This is a character Aigis from a game called Persona 3. I liked her design alot since she contrasted so much to the rest of the class that was mainly in a school uniform.

Some quick sketches of posing another character from the show I'm working on, and the bottom right is.. uhh Andrew W K's guide to partying hard. My friend Shaun and I got into his music for about a week until we started throwing our backs out from partying too hard... hence 'fig 3.' remember boys and girls, party hard, but party with good posture

Kaneda from Akira, I realized I had never done any artwork from Akira. Maybe because I was too afraid of it being way off model and well.. this is no exception hahaha!

These are 2 more sketches of characters from Persona 3. The one on the top right is Aigis again. And the bottom left is the main character. It was suppose to be a larger picture and his head isn't suppose to just be exploding there was suppose to be something else. But to explain it would take me a while and I dont feel like doing it, so... just google Persona 3 to find out if you want too!

Older Art (Part 2 of 2)

This girls got a plane on her head. I don't know what inspired it, maybe I thought it'd be cool to do someone with a plane for head gear!

Ok first off.. yeah I know she's a bit mis-proportioned hahaha! She's a character from a game called Odin Sphere on PS2. It sucks when you put a lot of detail into a picture only to realize that your proportions are off

This manga-esqe panel is from something I drew up for my friend John of both his car (the NSX) and my car in a Wangan Midnight style highway race.

This one is from work during Grossology, I think this was from the second time I got a scene to do in the show so I had to tackle doing more lip syncing and posing out my scenes ahead of time. I don't do that much anymore, and looking at this I figure maybe I should start doing it again, it was a lot of fun.

Ninja girl with super forced perspective! I always liked doing forced perspective stuff, but I'm pretty sure it's wrong in alot of places

This guy is a character from a game called 'Cave Story' done by an indie game developer. I played alittle bit of it but I never finished it. It was pretty good though, total 8-bit throw back to good platformers.


When I was at Mercury there was a posting around about making an idea for a short we could do. It kind of got me thinking about a fun show involving teenage kids so I sort of drew this random girl with a mean tilt on to her head. Oh and a quick sketch of katamari sort of looking character. Maybe he has an Arkanoid ship for a head or something.

Anyway thats all for my older stuff. I didn't have a whole lot of time to draw at the old studio.. or maybe that was the excuse I made for myself hahaha!

Older Art (Part 1 of 2)

a tribute to Calvin and Hobbes featuring 2 character from a show I worked on.

Tried doing some more north american styled work

The old Mercury office got pretty hot in the summer, I had to buy a fan but sometimes it wasn't enough.. hence... and no I'm not looking at porn

This character is a detective from Grossology, I really liked his character design because his gruff look really contrasted the rest of the cast, so I thought I'd stick him in a "Sin City" styled picture
Some of the guys at work got these funkie toys so I tried doing alittle version thingy of them, and I think I was playing Advance Wars at the time so I drew a funny looking tank.


Well as promised from my previous posted I made last week, I said I'd be updating more frequently!

So! Here beings my update of actual artwork to my site once again! This post and the next one are posts from stuff I did in early 2007 to November 2007. and yeah.. theres only 2 posts worth of pictures, hows that for drawing alot... ughh.. Either way, what better way to make up for lost time then to dump pictures all over the site!

So all the stuff in this post and the next post are older stuff. The post previous to this is alot more recent. After these 2 older art posts I'll have about 2 posts of stuff I've done at the new studio I'm working at.

In the meantime enjoy!

Holy Crap!! an UPDATE!??!

Yup!  it's time for a much needed update!  Here how about some pictures!  They're super shitty!

I've been fooling around with the tablet at work.  I haven't really drawn in a while and I have some stuff to scan as well.  Bare with me!  I'm getting back into my drawing thing!

Well it's been almost a year since my last post.  Lots of stuff has happened as per usual.  And now for a quick point form update!

- Lost job last november

- new job started in January

- new job is pretty awesome, no more late nights and weekends!

- feeling that my animation has improved 10 fold now that I'm free to explore the range of animation

- got to meet the character designer for Cowboy Bebop, and character designer that did Escaflowne and Chrono Cross, and got to meet the director of Mushishi and Now and Then, Here and There.

- Went on a friggin wicked road trip from Vancouver to LA, then drove from LA to Rosarito, Mexico and then all the way back in a car thats 4 years older then me.

- Did a track day with the car, the feeling of going back to a track after 3 years was amazing... loved it!

- Friend John just added another name to the Chu Family tree!

I know thats not everything, but it's all I can think of off the top of my head!

Anyway, I know I said this before as well, but I plan to post more regularly!  Now that I have time, and can have a social life etc.

Anyway, it's good to be back!

So where were we?

OK so... it's been 4 months since my last post... well. Lots of stuff has happened where do I start? Actually I know how I'll post up stuff that I was suppose to put up ages ago and we'll go from there. So 2 posts back, here is what I was suppose to post and it was my living room with the new TV. So! Here they are!

So as you can see on the left (hopefully the template shows them that way) is the new living room upgraded to now official geek palace status. Huge ass TV and computer provided and funded by my buddy Dan Carter. This meaty thing is now our crazy ass setup. Most of the time we just watch stuff we download and it's damn good at doing that.

Anyway, luxury stuff aside here's as much of an abbreviated version of whats happened over the last couple of months has happened.

- My friend Jarrett moved out here and is now living on my couch, having a good time except when it comes to his job (don't talk to him about it)
- I finished Grossology finally and I am glad it's done
- Working on a new show called Gerald Mc Boing Boing and it is leagues better then Gross because it's on 2'S!!!! and if your an animator you can understand this.
- Things have cleared up at work with my supervisors so that's all good.
- Visited Ottawa for the first time in almost a year which was a relaxing and enjoyable trip home.
- Family issues came up but wont get into.
- My grandmother on my moms side celebrated her 80Th birthday which was fantastic to see the family all together.
- I got a new bike and it's fantastic as well.
- I acquired a car with the collaborative help of Dan once again.
- and my friend Dan has also acquired a Japanese girlfriend!

That basically sums up the time in between.

So to go over things, I'll go over a couple of things here and there:

So my friend Jarrett is out here and it's been great. While things on his job front have been keeping his mind preoccupied, he's enjoying himself and I'm really enjoying his company and catching up on old times. I went to High School with Jarrett and well the story of how we met is interesting. I'll keep it short. I met Jarrett because I liked his girlfriend allot (Risa Hiriyama) so me not liking him because he's the guy in my way, I got to know him for the sake of doing intel on him. (You know the quote, "Know thy enemy" well that's pretty much what I was doing) After I got to know him it turns out he wasn't a bad guy at all and the best part is that he's my artistic friend. What I mean by that is that I have my 2 friends, Justin and Dan. They are programmers and back in the day they used to bounce ideas off each other to improve each others programming skills. I never had that. But when I met Jarrett I found a friend who I can relate to, and we shared very similar views, humor, etc. So now that he's out here I have a chance to talk with him again after 5 years he went away for Sheridan now he's out here getting a job. Crazy how life works out. Anyway, Jarrett is living with me till his girlfriend Bianca comes out here and then their going to find a place to live (looking forward to Bianca coming out!) But either way it's nice to see that he's here and that he's here to stay for a while. And while we occasionally reminisce about old times, I can only think of all the good times ahead now that he and Bianca will be out on the west coast to roll in the good times!

As for work, it's going well. I still find that I have to stay late nights to get stuff done, but since we're working on a new show it'll take sometime before I get totally comfortable but already I feel that things have leveled out and that I'm making good progress. My supervisors aren't giving me any problems. And generally everything is very easy going so I couldn't ask for much more. (Maybe some more money, but then again that's dependent on my work habits heh heh)

Visiting home was a nice experience. the funny thing about it is that after arriving I realized that nothing really much had changed. and while I've only been gone for a year, the time between felt like forever. But when I got back it felt like I hadn't left. But seeing family and friends is what really made this trip. Cleaning up my house was a very gratifying thing to do as well. For those who don't know me, my house is... well it was a pack rat house and still sort of is. But going through things and cleaning it up was good feeling, my mom needed the push and I'm glad that I could help. And while I didn't fix everything that my mom had down on the list, I feel I got a good amount of stuff covered.

It's funny typing these out it doesn't seem like I have much of a purpose for it... or maybe it's just that there doesn't seem to be any points of conflict in my life and I'm not being as reflective as I was in my last posts. I guess maybe life has been going so well for me that I nothing provocative to say. Or maybe I just can't think of anything to say that I can reflect on deeply. So you know what... I think I'll stop this post here, and until I can think of something cool to reflect on I'll share it with everyone. Because so far it just seems like a long and sort of boring look at how life is peachy.

With that I'll finish it up with this. Life is good, too good right now. But as I know from experience, and not to be a pessimist. But something along this road, I will run into a construction zone, the thing I know I have is that I have family and friends who care for me and it'll make all the bumpy roads in the road ahead feel like I'm riding on a pillow. And for my family and friends, I truly am thankful.
-

Spinning wheels while stuck in mud

OK, I realize I said I'd post up pictures for my last post, I will get around to it, but in the meantime I need to get this off of my chest.

My work, while rewarding in terms of how I feel about my work, doesn't seem to be viewed in the same way by my supervisors.

I work with 2 supervisors (they will remain anonymous) and we had a meeting today about my ability to focus, and while most people know me who visit my blog, focus... is not one of my strong points. But anyway, they talked to me about things that I did (like browse the net or watching a video) and things I don't do (like start a huge DS game of Tetris, and apparently distract EVERYONE at work) which I'm getting blamed for anyway.

I'll own up for stuff I'm doing, and thats fine, I do all that stuff in moderation though. The stuff I DON'T do and get blamed for.. wow that REALLY ticks me off!

Perfect example, today we got retakes to do of an old episode we had finished, I had about 30 scenes, but I only got 2 retakes to do. That of which I thought was pretty good. So I do my retakes, and a couple of guys around the office started a game of Tetris DS. So I decide to hop on for a game. So as we're playing, one of my supervisors comes over and says "OK guys get back to work" So I shut off my system and then began to turn around when I hear him say " What, you think this is a joke?" I think someone must have been laughing, but I had put my system down at this point and turned back to my work. about 30 minutes later, I get dragged into that meeting where he pins the blame on me for laughing and that I was responsible for all of that. and this isn't the first time it's happened where I've been singled out. It feels demeaning, to a point where it's almost discriminatory. And I've had just about as much as I can take.

On top of that, I have my other supervisor who knows me from school and I'm sure they've talked amongst each other (the other supervisors) about what I did in school which only works against me. I'm not the most concentrated guy, but everyone is different and it just seems almost like their weeding me out. The other supervisor also works as a teacher at an education institute here in Vancouver, and I can't help but feel like I've got this student teacher type association/ relation with him. and to top it off, since he knows about how I was in school that only means that he's more watchful to what I do during the work day making it feel even MORE like I'm in school, and no I'm not talking University or College, this is High School all over again.


This is kind of 1/2 way into the ice burg of the situation, but I understand that I can do better and will work hard to be better at my job and focus more so I can do better quality work. But what do you do when you think your doing good quality work, you ask all your co-workers how your work is and they say it looks good. You send your stuff in and of a majority of your scenes, none(or only 2 to be specific) come back for major retake work. Yet... your boss can talk your ear off about how my work sucks...

it makes it seem so futile to try harder, but I have to. Not for them but myself. Tomorrow I'm going to talk with one of them so I can get them out of my hair and off my back for a while, the other I'll just have to become a yes man. I am still new to this industry, and I understand I have a long way to go. But the last thing I want to have happen is become bitter in animation which will kill any motivation to want to pursue this field further. And while it seems like the world wants to conspire against me getting into this industry, I'll show myself, and I'll show them exactly why I've come to try so hard to work in this industry in the first place. But I'll do it my way and give it my all.

And now for something completely different!

(Note: pictures will be posted later of stuff.. but in the meantime, the post)

Well it's the 4Th of April and the first time in a while that I've posted something at the beginning of the month. Yup... that's a fact ladies and gentlemen reading this!

Spring is here! well sort of it's still cool outside but with less rain, thank god. I've gotten accustom to rain since I moved out here but man we had it raining and overcast for 3 weeks or something it was pretty miserable.

Any who, I always make it a habit of reading my last post before I post something new and looking back at last post... whoa it was heavy, but accurate to how I felt at the time. So as the title says, it's time for something... completely different.. (If you don't know the reference to Monty Pythons, I suggest you educate yourself on British comedy gold)

Anyway, news news news.. well I'm really busy at work, I've gone up from 1200 to 1800 frames this episode, next episode it'll be 2000 and I plan to see how high I can get with the 2 episodes remaining in Grossology (show I'm working on, it's on YTV and Discovery Channel... I think...)

So money and job are going well, since my last post I've gotten to know more people at the office so I feel that I've now settled in nicely and work life is great! I just need to draw more. recently I've been feeling a little self conscious of my artwork, but I'm sure it'll pass and I'll be back to regular Chan in no time.. wait that means procrastinating.. uh.. scratch that...

I also moved to a new station since last time and I've got a good window view of the city outside but more importantly.. the mountains! the mountains look just stunning when the sun rises every time I'm here at work over night... *cries*

This isn't to brag or anything but we just got a new TV at the house for our MOUNTAIN of CONSOLES (ECHO echo echo...) a nice big ol 50" HDTV and it's.. well fantastic. Plus one of my best friends picked up a computer for it so now we've got computer games and animu to watch on it, but since I work so often I don't get to enjoy it nearly as much, but not entirely a bad thing!

you know what... scratch that.. that TV is the sex.. and I'm pretty much bragging about it anyway... new Command and Conquer 3, full graphic settings.. 50" inches of RTS goodness

Also last week, my bike needed major fixing (I had busted a tire tube but it needed reworking, by brakes weren't braking, my gears weren't gearing, and my handle bar was off kilter, it made for a pretty funny site riding that thing. So I took it in and didn't have it for a weekend. so I had to make it on foot. (Oh noes, the horror your thinking) But it was nice, just walking thinking, listening to music on a nice spring day, afternoon, evening. It was refreshing, but on the flip side, man did it take allot longer to get home then if I had my bike. normally 5 minutes tops, but 15 minutes.. especially when you need to go to the can.. is an eternity, so needless to say I was quite happy to get it back.

Also I don't see why people drive in this city. Unless your going somewhere far or off route, the public transit system is amazingly efficient. And besides... driving in this city is crazy, drivers are either slow or way too aggressive.. (damn Chinese... wait...) and the gas prices on the west coast are.. staggering. we might be one of the countries with lower gas prices on a global scale but man, 4 years ago I was fearing it would hit 80 cents... and now... 1.10.. screw driving, the bike is the way to go when your on the west coast. And with summer around the corner, theres no excuse.

So yeah life is back to normal, feeling much better! but I still need a GF... well maybe not need a... well maybe... ....

But other then that things are on the up and up. I'm looking forward to July when I go back to Ottawa to see family and friends, get a good opportunity to soak it all in before I come back and do the daily grind once again. Also looking forward to my friend Jarrett coming out to the west coast for a job. should be good times, plus he gets to sleep with the TV next to him.. that is.. if he'll actually sleep hahaha!

Anyway, life is good, nothing deep this time, thats why the title of this post is "And now for something completely different!"

Long time coming

Hey everyone out there who is reading this, probably not, I've been spending alot of time on Facebook and it's occupied alot of time I've been spending instead of posting here, so I'm back and I'll try not to neglect my blog spot.

Originally, I didn't post because anything because I was thinking, " How do I follow up my years end/ beginning post? It was pretty epic stuff (at least I thought) but then again... it's my blog I can post whatever I want so here I am with an update on life. Although it's not going to be as uplifting as my new years post, but hey, this is life.

Well, I'm working into my 7th month here at MFW, and work is good and life in general is good. Maybe it's just today I feel I have the winter blues (even though it's not much of a winter here in Van) or I'm just depressed. Why should I be though? I'm in vancouver, I have a job, and my friends are out here. But something is lacking.. and thats the feeling of being completed.

At work, I have friends, but just friends from work. I want to get to know people better, but I feel a distance in the depth of how much I know everyone. Everyone here has gone to school together, so everyone knows each other well. I feel like I'm on the outside looking in. Thats why I try and go out every time the group goes out for dinner run to try and get to know everyone better, but I still can't help but feel distant.

Theres also a bit of office politics that I'm encountering. At least from the group I've moved into. Generally it's not all good, and I know where my place is in the group as the newbie, but this probably has something to do with the feeling left out part. where the rest of my group has been part of this for 8 months I've just come on board. And while I'm not going to get into it.. it's not exactly motivating to say the least...

Heh heh, maybe I'm in a state of depression... because I'm thinking as I'm writing this and it struck me that I might be depressed. I think the factors are a combination of lack of an intimate relationship, home sickness, the rain and low pressure system? Or all of the above.

When I see everyone at work talking with each other as I have my headphones on while plugging away at my work, while Chris my supervisor breathes down my neck... (with good intention) I can't help but feel home sick about my friends from animation and the fun we had. Not to say that it won't happen again, but theres that level of comfort I haven't reached yet with people at work, and it'll come in time I'm sure. But it's something I miss. I guess I was at a level of comfort I can talk to my friends at home about anything. And since I feel distant from people at work, I kinda miss the comfort of my friends from animation. And not just my friends from animation, my friend John and his family. I liked going over there spending time with the kids, talking with John about what new stuff he's going to buy, Misa preparing awesome food. Even being home, and my mom's home cooked meals. Wow... yeah I guess I'm home sick!

In terms of intimate relationship... yeah thats a toughie. I'm positive I'm just not assertive enough, I lack confidence, and my shyness. Just insecure in general. I really have no reason too be this way when I think about it logically. I have a good job, I love what I do, and I get paid pretty decently. However I choke alot or I miss chances. This past valentines day... wow.. I felt like the loneliest guy on the planet... I sort of half ass tried Lavalife but everytime I send a smiley no one replies. heh heh, It's like applying for jobs and not hearing anything back from anywhere, it gets quite disheartening after a while.

I see my friends who have girlfriends and I feel happy for them, yet at the sametime think. "Why can't I find someone that awesome?" I'm not even looking for the sex (at the moment... what... I'm a guy!) I'm looking for someone to talk to someone who I can share moments with and enjoy... haha sounds like I want to settle down hahaha! I don't know, but I do feel lonely in the relationship department... it's been a while since I've had a girl, and a LONG time since I've had a girlfriend..

I tend to also think that, " My work requires me for long hours of being there, so I wouldn't feel good if I couldn't give someone else the time and dedication that I feel they need and deserve" And that kind of thought also prevents me from getting into a relationship. Perhaps it's an excuse, but it's just who I am as a person, but maybe that aspect of me needs to change.

I dont know why it's bothering me so much these days.. Maybe since I'm working it's no longer something to think about, and I've moved on to areas of my life I feel are lacking... and these are what I think is affecting me right now.

maybe my next post will be alittle more positive, but in the meantime for the moment... I guess I'm depressed, but the best part is, these days will pass and so will these feelings. So I'm pretty sure my next post will be a positive one... or not, but hey.. thats life!

Resetting calender with a "new game +" called 2007

The title is a little video game pun, heh heh, (gad I'm a nerd)

Anyway, here we are, 2007. Do we feel any different from last year? Not really. But will it be as exciting as last year? probably not, but you never know?

Highlights from last year were, my sister getting married, and me moving out to Vancouver. Other highlights were cleaning up the pack rat house, and my mom closing her Chinese healing group she had created and FINALLY enjoying her retirement. I guess this year if you think about it. It's been a very family oriented year, something that hasn't happened in a while, and it's great.

I sit at my computer, thinking about all that has happened in the past year and reflect. (I'm also listening to BT (Brian Transeau) - Satellite, excellent song. If you want to listen to something as you read this, this is the song I'll have been listening to the entire time I wrote this post.)

What a wild year it's been. I mean every year has had something special, this year is just as nutty as the last.

It also had me wondering what will even happen this year. I have goals I'd like to accomplish this year, but really since this is the beginning, who knows what will happen. I sometimes envy the lives of people who can live it on the fly and by the moment, and every so often I try and do the same. But my tendency is to think it through well and plan things out accordingly, and well... it's gotten me this far so I have to be doing something right!


I decided to post that picture I did of *ahem* "myself"and I remember it well last year. At that point, I had failed animation. I knew it was something I wanted to pursuit, but I didn't want to go back again for another round. I had failed twice now, and with the new programs curriculum for the 3 year course (me and my class being the guinea pigs of the new 3 year) I decided that it was time I did it on my own. I had many friends fail out with me that were all going back, but that was it for me. Failing twice? I know when I'm beat.. on this field of play at least, but I wasn't going to let that stop me from reaching my goal.

At that time, I also had to consider looking for a job, I didn't want to bum it up and not make any money.

And well... like has happened before... I found myself at a turning point. A point where I had to choose.

After living out in Vancouver the previous summer, I knew that it would be the only place in Canada I'd consider moving too. So it then came down to a choice. Friends played a crucial role in my decision but also... it's Vancouver, a gorgeous departure from Ottawa's rather bland scenery and social scene.

I have expressed this before in previous posts. I have a love/hate relationship with Ottawa (city of origin) I like it in the retrospect that I regard it as a good city to live in... when you have a family. I have lots of friends there (2 to 1 degree's of separation, I swear) What I don't like about it was it's conservative nature, it's cold winters, abysmal night life (and even more abysmal was the attitude problem a majority of the women have in Ottawa), and it's primary industry... government. So it came time to choose.

That picture was sort of a representation of how I was feeling, and.. kinda what I was dressed like when I was thinking about it. (Winter, bumming it up at home) I tried to illustrate a "thinking" expression or lost in thought type idea. Again, I had reached a turning point.

I had a previous turning point back when I was in University. I was working and doing a university course I didn't like. It was a miserable time. I didn't know where my life was going or how I was going to lasso it down. I was working through a course that I slept through, wasting time and money. Working a job I was unsatisfied with. Until I finally broke free and went to College for animation, where I finally felt amongst the like minded, and ultimately, comfortable.

In fact, I don't really express this to everyone but, I'll share it to whoever reads this because who knows. Either you've been there, you haven't, or you'll call me a pussy or emo. To that I say " Your opinion" because these are my growing pains. My coming of age.

After about a year into animation the second time around, my friend Dave invited me out to the University bar which has pub night every Thursday. I decided to come out since my university card was still good for ID to get in. When I got there, and sort of had a chance to gaze around the crowd and take it all in, I realized I didn't fit in. And not that I didn't fit in, its like I had come back. Back to a time where life was guiding me. I lacked control and direction, I was lost. All these people seemed so confident in whatever major or pursuit they had in university. I never had that feeling ever when I was there. I suddenly thought back for a moment about college and how I had felt like I belonged, and how I was amongst people like me. And I suddenly broke down. I went out to the smoking section to a corner and was overcome with emotions. but not out loud or anything. Thinking about college made me reflect on the time I was at university and how completely lost and ambitionless my life was, and the feelings came in a tidal wave. It was like I had taken a step back in time, and it was to a time where my life was adrift. I was out there for a good 40 minutes until I went inside, told Dave I was leaving and then left. I haven't stepped back in that bar since then.

Perhaps when I look back at things now, maybe those tears were mixed with ones of happiness. Happiness in the fact that I had a place I could go back to and be amongst friends, classmates.. and the feeling of belonging.

To the people reading this right now.. if you have lived your life by the seat of the pants, maybe you can't relate to me. But for those who have been down this path, I share my experience with you. For those who haven't walked this path. If you can, avoid it. but if so, I hope that I would have been some help with this story of my life and my experience.

It's wild really... Reflecting on how things have worked out. Is there anything about the past year I would have changed? Nothing, and not for the world.

If there is one thing I can take from the people who live by the moment, it's that I have no regrets, no qualms. I seek to live today for today, and plan for tomorrow. So I say to you 2007, for whatever may happen in the year to ensue.. bring it on!

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!
- Family & Friends

When the dust settles

Well it would appear that I have a running theme going here with posts coming up around the 20-ish days of the month! So to go along with that trend, here's an update on my life as she goes. (You know, for my huge fan base of people reading this hahaha)

So, what has happened since I last posted? Well, to put bluntly? ALOT!

So since my last post I was seeking employment, not just your standard employment. Employment in the field that would be the beginning of the rest of my career in the entertainment industry.

So it was approaching time towards the end of November, I was at the tail end of my cash that I had saved. It was high time I got myself a job, only thing was, I wasn't about to settle. There are jobs out here in the west. Lots of jobs... You can walk around anywhere to any mall, any shop, any section of town, you see help wanted signs everywhere. But none of which I wanted. At this point in my life, I have worked many a job. From cubical jockey to tree planter. The problem with this is, those were all transitional jobs. Jobs that facilitated my life style and the pace of work that I enjoyed at the time.

Transitional jobs for some... can become regular jobs, or jobs that will rob the years away from what you intended to do in life. Sometimes, we'll get comfortable and settle for these transitional jobs, that tend to migrate from the "transition" category to the " lets try and build a retirement off of this" job, but not me.

It's amazing what the power of friends can do, and the people you surround yourself with can give you the power and motivation to do great things. Which is why I'm happy that I've been blessed with good friends, and always welcome good company. If your blessed with the right kind of friends, the ones that encourage you and aspire you to do more and go beyond, while at the same time have ambitious pursuits of their own, it's really motivating. And you'd be amazed and the people you meet and the places you'll go. (I think I'm starting to sound like a Dr.Seuss book)

So, I had worked on those pieces and posted them up here. I also posted them up on my portfolio site. And as I was finishing clean up on one section, I get an MSN from my friend Eric. Eric is a good friend of mine from animation. He had relocated out here for work as well, conveniently for me, in an animation company as well. Mercury Film Works. After he noticed that I updated my blog site, he checked out what I had posted and said that I should come in and that I was ready (Might I add that Eric is also a supervisor at MFW). So I finished up my work ASAP, made it out to a Staples, got a clear case folder, prepped my bag, got my sketch book, put on some nice clothes and out the door I went.

I arrived at the office late due to an address mix-up. But luckly everyone was cool with that. My interview went well... and it's funny that I think about it. For all the work I had put into my resume. To build it up to that point where I had a pretty crazy job list, even though my formal education was... well lets just say thats on hold until further notice.. the only thing that happened with it was. It was sorted into a folder for Human Resources employee reference and personal information. That's it. It was a little bit of, "Wow, I've entered into a work place that doesn't care about my prior job experience, it's all skill of animation." and whole lotta of, " Man that is freakin awesome!"

Needless to say, I've been at MFW for about a month and a week and I love it, it's great. The people are fantastic to work with. The office environment is really nice a refreshing (open concept office place) Everyday I go to work I feel challenged in my tasks and also learn something new everyday. It's great because, I haven't had this feeling of enjoyment from a job in a long time. Another thing thats nice is that it's a tight knit group. We're a pretty small team, and if you scale it against the Ottawa offices (Ottawa - 100 + staff. Vancouver - 30.. maybe), I don't know. It really give you the feeling that you're apart of something special. And too me, all these reasons above are what the defining differences between a job, and a career are all about to me. Something I'm willing to dedicated my life too. Well, not just to animation (thats a big part of it) but to animation and where ever animation will guide me. And I'm thankful that I'm fortunate enough to have that luxury to choose, and I realize that many people don't have that freedom of choice.

Anyway, working pretty much leads up to now, I've been working quite abit these days. Except for maybe Christmas break. Lots of time with the family which is fun and sometimes alittle frustrating at times, but it's family, how can you frustrated with them? I got to spend some quality time with my cousin Phil. Unfortunately, his wife is in the hospital, and has been since Christmas eve... My cousin Phil was very close to my dad, so we get along great, and we've had talks here and there about family which always interest me. It's always nice to learn something new, even if it's not good news about the family. It's engaging.

I hope I didn't gain a belt size or anything, because either way I'll have lots of left overs for a while...

Anyway, I kinda rambled on with this one. But either way, life is good. I hope it stays that way. And for those who I haven't gotten around to saying it too, I wish you a Merry Christmas, or Merry Pagan Holiday! And a Happy New Year to you as well.

I'll probably make a New Years post with declarations of the new year. (Wow, a post in less then 20 days?!) Lets see if this really happens!

And finally the part 2 that actually came! (check the previous)

OK so I decided to switch it up for this post and it's probably going to become my standard, maybe Im doing something wrong with the formatting but adding pictures doesn't go to the area of text just after what you wrote, it goes to the TOP of the post and then you have to drag it down through the post (or Im just lazy not going through the HTML part of the post) anyway...

OK so with all the characters I came up with. The coloured one (holy crap I COLOURED SOMETHING) is the take on the Dexter's Lab styled design, ultimately the easiest one to colour because of simplicity. It took me some fidgitting around with the colours to find something I was kinda happy with. The other character is named Erik, he's suppose to be the huge hulking mass thats the same age as the other 2 characters just he's xbox HUEG as the half assed size chart is concerned. I had alot of fun doing his facial expressions, and I like his character alot actually even though I put more time into the other two. I guess sometimes simple is better! I had by friend Jarrett go over my stuff and make suggestions to the designs and some issues for clean up. He also liked Erik, and you can check out a cool rendition he did of him on his website. (see links to the side)

Anyway, I'm on the victory lap of my portfolio, while I'm not totally happy with what I'm handing in, however I am confident that I can get an entry level animation position.

I've been worrying and procrastinating because of I guess my self esteem when it comes to my skills and level of ability in art is not as far along as I hoped. But I think through getting a job in the industry and working hard at improving my skills in my off time, it will help me to improve and further expand as an artist. modesty and willingness to learn being my weapons in the fight for a job.

I gotta at this point, even though I haven't got the job yet, say thanks to my friends and family for their continued support of me doing something like this. My family for agreeing to let me do animation (you know, Chinese families) and my friends for pushing me to keep moving and improving. I promise you all, I'll get there one way or another!